Fifteen Years of Progress: A Writer's Journey

Over fifteen years ago I started writing a novel titled Flight Moon. After a series of rewrites, I have finally decided to finish it. The basic story is the same, but as my writing matured, the story had to as well.

I would like to share a sample of this new novel, with the version from the first write and the current scene in progress.

 Here is the old version, complete as I wrote it as a preteen (with spelling and grammatical errors as they were in 1998).

     Flight Moon heard the voices and something overtook her, she was swelled in a brilliant flash of red light. Gakulisan stepped back and looked at the split-second gleam of colors. He shielded his eyes and then opened them as he felt the sudden heat diminish. He then looked at a small child, barley old enough to walk, which had no legs. Though struck, he still picked up the child and wrapped her in his cloak just as Corban came around the corner. The wizard did not look up to them; he just stared at the child in his arms. Although Gakulisan never saw the baby before, he felt as though he knew her. He looked into the baby’s eyes; they were as red a fire. Flight Moon was alive inside the child.

Lifetime and education experience has molded me into the writer I am today. Hiring an editor was one of the best decisions I made as an author. Being a member of critique websites such as and Scribophile improved my writing as well.

Here is the new version of the same scene (slight spoiler alert!)

     “Your family is not my concern,” Flight Moon spoke, but felt her throat constricting when she glanced at the child.
     “You seek the Mage... but why, if you are not his allies? Is he your foe?” Corban demanded.
     The dragon’s face twitched. “It depends what he did to me,” she growled.
     The boy infant, startled, turned to face her.
    The back of Flight Moon’s eyes burned at the sight of his face. She felt detached from the vision, as if she moved backwards from it. Surrounded by a tunnel of darkness, the light became smaller. She was falling backwards into herself. She drew one long, distant breath, and the light went out.
     The great beast collapsed before them. Before Gakulisan could approach her, strong energy started to radiate from her body. Surges seared from her like lisps of horizontal flame across the ground. A nearby plant was consumed by the energy and burst into glowing orange ash. The ground beneath the dragon began to char and cinder and the air crackled with unbalanced charge.
     “Get back!” Gakulisan ordered the two onlookers and they complied, watching the dragon’s body remain still, and yet change.
     The dragon was... fading. Her scales seemed translucent. The energy field strengthened, then manifested into a burst of flame. An intense blue sphere expanded outward with a crackling hum. The blanket of flames shot towards the onlookers and they ducked and tried to shield themselves. But Gakulisan looked back. Through the heat distortion he was barely able to see the red of her scales. Then with a dramatic pull of air pressure and a deafening boom, she disappeared.

Thanks for stopping by! Come back again for more excerpts and previews.

All content is original work and copyrighted by the author.

1 comment:

  1. Isn't it amazing what time and experience can do to your writing? I often wonder what my writing will read like in another ten years.